Birth Story Series: My first birth - 2022, part 2

...continued from part 1 last week

Simo came to see if I was OK. He’d heard my waters break and thought I’d vomited! I told him my waters had broken and he messaged Marianna (8:50) who said she was on her way. This was shortly followed by the most incredible sensation of my body just taking over with a “pushing” contraction. I wasn’t prepared for it and it was so out of my control!

[I learned later that the kind of contraction reflex I experienced here is known as the Ferguson reflex, and I experienced it as a type of uncontrollable convulsion, like my body was “vomiting down”. It’s something completely out of your control, your body working very effectively to push your baby out! More on the different types of birth reflexes in this podcast episode.]

I made some kind of noise through it and Simo came back. I realised by this time that I was never going to get the “longer gaps between contractions” that I'd been waiting for, and that now I was actually through active labour and transition already and into the pushing phase! I told Simo I hoped Marianna would arrive soon because I thought our baby would be born pretty soon! Another contraction arrived, and this time I managed to breathe through it, using the down breathing pattern. It was much more manageable! I stayed on the toilet for a while longer, breathing through each contraction while gripping onto the pockets of Simo’s jeans, though every so often there was a contraction that caught me a bit off guard and I didn’t manage to keep my breathing so controlled. The really nice thing now was actually having breaks between contractions in which I could relax!

Although I was comfortable on the toilet, my leg was going to sleep so I got up and stood leaning on Simo for a while. Marianna arrived at 9:10 so he went down to let her in and I leaned on the bathroom windowsill instead and was there breathing through a contraction when Marianna got upstairs. I was aware of her coming in but she just put her hand very gently on my shoulder and waited for the contraction to finish before doing or saying anything. Then she had a listen for baby's heartbeat, and took a while to find it because she’d moved down so far compared to where Marianna was looking to start with! Anyway, she found the heartbeat and all was fine.

Marianna left me with Simo and went to get some things organised in the living room, coming back every so often to check the baby’s heartbeat. When she was done organising she came and suggested to Simo that she stay with me while he prepare a hot drink with honey for me. He went off to do that, and I had a couple more contractions before Marianna suggested moving through to the living room, saying something about trying to go on all fours. We moved towards the living room and when I saw the lounge I must have just instinctively known that I wanted to go back to my previous position of kneeling on the lounge leaning against the back — Simo says that I got halfway across the room with Marianna and then just raced across the rest of it and got on the lounge! Marianna had covered it with an old plastic tablecloth we’d prepared and put a sheet over that. Simo had the herbal tea ready but it was too hot to drink. I was drinking a lot of water though, and since I had breaks and time to think about it I asked Simo to bring me some banana, and I ate bits of that between contractions. That went down very well. Contractions kept coming and by this stage I was feeling a lot more pressure from baby's head, and as things moved on I was becoming aware that the head was getting lower with each contraction and then going back up a bit as the contraction finished. [This “down and back up” movement is expected with a first baby, as it allows the perineum to stretch gradually and reduce the risk of tearing.]

Valentina, the second midwife, arrived at 9:45 and by then they could see the head during the contractions and Simo had helped me to touch it once, though it didn’t feel like head, just felt soft and squishy! By now the contractions were pretty close together. No stronger than before, I wouldn’t say, but there was a lot more pressure because of how low baby was, so they were more intense. I just kept breathing through them. I could feel how stretched my perineum was getting and knew the head was close to coming out. I’d heard of the “ring of fire” and I guess it did sting or burn a bit but it mostly just felt stretched! Marianna started to tell me to try and keep going with the breathing extra each time, and then to try and accompany the contraction and breathing with extra downwards effort. I did, and the head kept coming further out. It got to the point where they could see the top of the head as far as the eyebrows, but no eyes yet! With the next contraction baby was born! — the rest of the head, left shoulder, and all the rest of her body, along with a big gush of fluids. I didn’t realise to begin with she’d been born already, though I had felt and seen all the fluid that came out, along with feeling a great sensation of relief from all the pressure of the last hour or so. It was 10:15am, less than 6.5hrs from when I woke up this morning!

Simo caught her when she arrived, I finally registered that she’d been born, she started crying, they untangled the cord, and passed her up to me. I snuggled her on my chest and after a little bit she calmed down. I didn’t cry. I thought I might have done since when I’ve watched birth videos in the past months I always cry when the baby’s born! But I didn’t cry. I was just happy and relieved and thankful! ❤️ The midwives moved the blood-soaked disposable mats from under me and put fresh ones down, then they helped me manoeuvre around and lie down on the lounge. After a couple of minutes I started shaking — not really so much for the cold as a reaction to all the physical (and probably emotional/mental/psychological) strain of the previous six hours. They covered me with a blanket and brought me a warm drink and I gradually settled down.

Baby M stayed skin-to-skin with me, and after a while started to feed. She latched on with no trouble at all and stayed on me for a good hour or so. At some point Marianna asked me to try and give a little push, and the placenta came out with no trouble at all. Simo Sat behind me on the lounge to prop me up, and Marianna had a look at my perineum. I had a second-degree tear which she stitched up. That was not fun, and I squeezed Simo's hand very tightly during the procedure! After that was all done and baby had finished feeding, Simo had some skin-to-skin time with her while the midwives helped me get cleaned up and changed the covers on the lounge. Then it was time to check baby M. They clamped the cord, which Simo cut, weighed and measured M, and we put a nappy on her. The midwives finished cleaning up and had left us to ourselves by 1:30pm. Baby weighed 3.7kg (8lb 2oz), was 51cm long, and had a 35.2cm head circumference. We feel so blessed! 💕💕

This birth was such an incredible, surreal experience for me! I had spent so much time preparing, but never imagined such an amazing experience, it far exceeded my expectations! It was all so calm, peaceful and perfectly manageable. And so much faster than I had imagined! It’s crazy how you go into a time warp when you’re in labour. I had prepared myself for the long haul, and then before I knew it I was already pushing her out! I am so thankful for my amazing husband and wonderful midwives! And of course for God’s protection and strength for me and baby M through the whole process. 😍

[Photo of me with baby M, a week after birth]