17 Weeks Pregnant - the things people say!

Weekly pregnancy updates from a childbirth educator, doula and mum to 2 little girls. Come and join me on my journey as I share how I’m feeling, how baby is developing, what I’m doing to prepare, and some favourite resources!

It’s been a big week, but we are back from the other side of the world after our three weeks away in Italy visiting family! Travelling with kids is a whole different dimension to travelling alone or with other adults. With having family on opposite sides of the world, international travel with kids has been our norm since our oldest was 5 months old, and as a 3.5 year old now she’s getting quite expert! We love the opportunity to teach our children life skills and expand their horizons! Our second went from “furniture walking” to become quite a confident walker while we were away, and of course another first was feeling baby move for the first time! ❤️

This was my first time travelling internationally while pregnant. We’d already booked our flights before I fell pregnant, but thankfully the timing worked out that I was already in second trimester and feeling pretty good!

The things people say...

It’s pretty common to see posts on social media of the things you should and shouldn’t say to pregnant women, such as remarks on the size of their belly. Some women won’t be bothered at all, but just imagine if you tell a woman who’s struggled with body image and weight loss that she’s “looking big”. It may be a completely innocent comment, intended as an encouragement that her baby is growing well, but imagine the impact it can have on someone who is battling or has battled with size/weight!

On the flip side, making a comparison comment along the lines of “when I was as far along as you, my belly was so much bigger” can be really harmful to a mum who has dealt with pregnancy loss or had a baby with restricted growth...even if what you really mean is that she is looking great whereas you struggled with your own weight gain in pregnancy.

The bottom line is, think carefully about your words and about the impact they can have! And unless you know someone really well, please don’t make too many personal remarks! You might mean it as encouraging, but unless you know someone’s full story, you don’t always know the right words to encourage them.

Cultural differences

I’ve found that generally Australians are more careful about the way they talk to pregnant women than Italians. I did have an elderly Australian friend tell me a few weeks back that “you’re really protruding now”, but said in an entirely friendly way, and I am always so proud when my pregnancy is visible that I am not at all bothered by such comments!

Italians, on the other hand, are much freer in their comments! I had someone tell me when they first saw me, “You've eaten too much!”. It was a friend, and I know full well it was tongue in cheek and referring to the size of my pregnant belly, and again, I took it in the sense it was meant and laughed along with the comment.

Gender predictions based on belly shape!

I definitely lost count of the number of people in Italy who analysed and commented on the shape of my belly and told me this baby is “definitely a boy, you’re carrying all the weight in the front — if it was a girl you'd be carrying it more on your hips”, or “you've got a pointy belly — the baby is definitely a boy, with a girl it would be more rounded”. Funnily enough, the same people made exactly the same comments on my belly in my previous two pregnancies, both with baby girls!! I did try explaining this, but some old wives’ tales are so persistent! To be honest, I do have a bit of a feeling this baby might be a boy, but it’s definitely not based on my belly shape! Hopefully we’ll find out in a few weeks at the morphology scan and be able to set all the guesses to rest one way or the other!

What symptoms am I feeling?

I'm feeling at least some movement every day now, still not super strong, but definitely picking up. It makes me so happy 🥰 Besides that, I did have a couple of nose bleeds after getting off the plane when we got back to Australia. Nose bleeds can be more common with flying, but can also be more common in pregnancy, and I’m guessing for me it was a combination of the two. I am not prone to them, but did have one or two through my last pregnancy (not connected with flying).

How has baby been developing this week?

At around 19cm long and 280g, baby now has a fine layer of hair called lanugo which covers the body to protect the skin. This is shed towards the end of the pregnancy or in early postpartum.

What am I doing to prepare?

Looking forward to a visit from my midwife later today 😊

And that’s it for this week! 🌿💛

[Image credit: a trip with my family to Trevi, Italy, September 2025]